I've Become One of Them...

Yeah, all my non-parent readers; you know what I'm talking about. I remember people like me. Or rather, I remember when I was like you and I would meet people like the person I am now.

Two years ago, this would be indicative of the small talk that I would partake in during my daily life:

Me: Nice day, huh?

Person with whom interaction is unavoidable: Yeah, you bet. Nice to finally get a stop to the rain.

Me: Yeah, hope it holds off this weekend, I haven't cut the grass since June 6th.

Person: Yeah, but it's only the ninth.

Me: I meant of 2006.

Person: Ha. I know what you mean. That'll be eighteen dollars. Cash or check?

Me: Check. Who do I make it out to?

Person: The name of the store is fine.

Me: Okay. "Awesome Store For People With No Kids Who Can Still Have Fun R Us." Thanks! Take care!

Person: Have a good one!

Sometimes, I'd get involved with these kinds of conversations:

Me: Little bit wet out today.

Person: I know. Just this morning, I was getting my kids ready to go out for the day, and one of them asked me if rain was the Angels spilling their sippy cups. Oh, I just laughed and laughed!

Me: Ha. Kids sure can be cute.

Person: I know! Here, I'm not even going to ask, I'm just going to show you six hundred identical pictures of my kids!

Me: Ah, cute. Cute...cute...cute...also cute...and cute...and cute...and...cute...so who do I...cute...make the...cute...check...cute...out to...cute...?

Person: This one just learned how to tie his brother's shoes together so that his brother would fall down when he tried to walk! So funny!

But lately, I find my conversations going more like this:

Person: What a gorgeous day? Do you think it'll stay nice, or do you think it'll get really hot again?

Me: LOOK AT THIS PICTURE OF MY BABY!!!!!!!!!! AND ALSO THIS PICTURE OF MY BABY!!!!!!!! AND ALL THESE OTHER PICTURES TOO!!!!!!! LISTEN TO MY STORY ABOUT HER SAYING THE WORD "PICTURE" OVER AND OVER AGAIN!!!!!!

I was reflecting on that today when somebody with whom I was having one of these conversations made the following remark: "Well, somebody sure is a proud father..."

Only, it didn't sound nice. It sounded snarky, like she would rather not have been subjected to the one single picture I showed her of my baby, and that she didn't care to hear that this morning Juliette bit half a Cheerio in half and then offered me the uneaten half for breakfast, since I was running late and had to skip mine. Come on, lady, this might be your future president; don't you take comfort in the fact that she already knows how to share what she has with those less fortunate? Geez.

So, readers, I have become one of them. And I guess you already knew that since I have a blog about it which you are reading at this moment. But just know that if I ever become overbearing with my gushingly effusive love for my daughter, it's only because having a child flips some switch in your brain that turns you into a kind of raving lunatic. You may know what I mean some day.

To all of my readers, have you encountered this? Those of you with children, have you experienced someone else's complete indifference to your child-driven insanity? Those of you without children, has anyone ever driven you to insanity in this way? Let me know.

And now, I leave you with a picture of Juliette, and a promise for a new post tomorrow concerning pictures. Trust me, you'll want to stay tuned for that one!

Juliette 6/25/2011, St. Louis Bread Co, Yogurt Mustache.