The Truth and Fiction Behind Photos of Your Children

So, the other day, Jules was looking out the front window when she saw Grace, a little girl a few months older than Juliette, outside walking with her mother Lisa. Grace was pushing her Minnie Mouse doll in a stroller. Well, Jules immediately grabbed Shoo Shoo Q (Susie Q maybe? It's her doll who has a stroller...) and pushed her up to the door. "Mama Dada I want to go for a walk," she said, apparently forgetting that we had just gone for one. But, hey, we had forty-five minutes to bedtime, and the promise of an incredibly cute situation on our hands. So Jules and I went outside, while Kathy got her shoes on and grabbed the camera.

Up the street we went, chatting with Lisa and watching Jules and Grace interact with each other. Eventually, we got this awesome picture of the two of them.

Okay, so, maybe it's not perfect. Certainly you can't see either of their faces, but they are both rather young and rambunctious, plus they were out in the fresh air trying to impress each other with their stroller skills.

But those of you with kids know, this wasn't the only attempt to get a picture. This was just the best.

So I want to share with you the first attempt. The attempt in which, just seconds before, Jules saw a puppy, and immediately all else was second rate. All she wanted was to point to the puppy, go to the puppy, tell everybody around about the puppy, hug the puppy, kiss the puppy, and generally abandon all else for the sake of the puppy. Background: we live at the bottom of a hill, and we were walking back towards our house at this moment. I am in this picture as well. See if you can find me.

August - The BUSIEST MONTH EVER

Jules, making way for Ducklings in Boston, August 5th, 2011

August was super busy for Kathy and I. The vacation at the start of the month was a welcome break, but after the rest of the month, we could sure use another vacation. Ugh.

But here we are, September 1st, and it's a new month and Jules is nearing her 13 month birthday. So I thought, since I didn't get a good update in on her actual birthday, I'd share some information with you.

"Working" on her laptop. Working = Dancing

Juliette loves to play and dance. Her favorite toys are the ones that play music. One of her birthday presents was a toy cell phone; most of the buttons just make regular phone noises and one plays a message that Kathy recorded for her, but her favorite buttons are the * and # buttons, the only two on the phone that play music. She will press one of those buttons and get to shimmyin' and shakin' like it's nobody's business!

Not taken by JJ Abrams

Juliette can say many many words these days, and does. Here's the list:

Picture!

Ball

Doll

Dad

Dadda

Hi

What's that?

Mom

Momma

Spoon

What's up?

Good.

Yes (I like this one)

No (d'oh!)

Kit (kitty)

Gen (gentle, when referring to the cat)

Book (though she does not pronounce the 'k,' she puts a 't' at the end)

Per (or Diaper depending on her mood)

Juice (anything in her sippy cup)

Light

Clock

Block

Boston

Water

Yeah (learned from Cousin Lydia, I think)

Bird (be it a bird, rabbit or squirrel)

Flower

Basketball (not kidding, she said it after hearing me say it once)

Cup

Down

Pants

Shirt (sounds like...something else)

Bear

Ba ba (Lamb or sheep, also what Sheepo says)

Bye bye

Shoe

Here (as in "here you go, I found this fuzz on the floor and I'm giving you four seconds to get it out of my hands before I eat it. Four-three-two-one nom nom.")

Yuck (usually 5-7 seconds after "here")

Relaxin' done RIGHT

In the past few weeks, Juliette has learned that the kitty is super soft, and that she'll let you experience this softness if you're very gentle. Jules has always been curious about Amethyst, and would laugh whenever she'd walk into the room. They have been playing together since Jules was able to sit up, with Amethyst rubbing Juliette's back and Jules laughing and grabbing for her. For a while, they played with balls together; Juliette would roll a ball across the floor to Amethyst, who would sometimes roll it right back. But recently, this started (see above). ADORABLE CITY.

Dad, if you make me listen to ONE MORE obscure indie-pop album from the last decade...

We went on a road trip to Nebraska for the weekend two weeks after Juliette's Birthday. We got to see cousins.

Cousins don't stand still when asked.

We saw others as well...

Grandpa

Aunt Kristie

Aunt Lori

Grandma

Also there but, oddly not pictured: Aunt Lisa, Aunt Carissa, Uncle Steve and soon-to-be Uncle Justin.

The weekend had to end, though...

Daddy Knew where his Towel Was. I'm counting upside down.

On the drive back, the sun was in Juliette's eyes. But we fixed that.

After a month like this, we just like to sit back and relax with a good book.

Or maybe, considering the heat, a cool soda would be good.

Ode to Sodie, Bo-de-o-dodie! Auntie Mo, hold me more often so I can get more of this SUGAR WATER YUM!

Oh, yeah, Juliette learned how to drink from a straw. Also how to use the Tupperware shape sorter.

Also, this mad adorableness.

I'm getting verbal updates from Kathy as I blog, so: Juliette learned how to build a small stack of blocks. She "cooks" her animals. She got a farm animal puzzle and a set of utensils and pans for her play kitchen, and she put the pig, cow and chicken into a frying pan and stirred them around with a spatula. That's my girl! Though, really, you should be grillin' all that, unless of course it's ground beef, chicken breast for pasta and bacon. Oh man...I'm so hungry right now...

While sitting with Poppy at his piano the other day, she watched his fingers intently and mimicked what he was doing. Do we have a musical prodigy on our hands? Do we have active imaginations? Maybe. But a musical prodigy wouldn't be a terrible thing. Prodigies tend to land recording contracts and end up on the Tonight Show at age 11 and...wait...do I want that? No...but I wouldn't mind her being musical (see above, re: dancing).

Stairs are no longer an obstacle but an out and out danger, at least as far as going up is concerned (we tend to not let her hang out around the top of unblocked steps, the experts frown on that). Get her at the bottom of a staircase, and up she'll go. She can manage it all on her own, but every time I've seen her do it I've seen it happen from half an inch away. Strange thing, though; when I've seen other kiddos learn stairs, they tend to crawl up on their hands and knees. Jules is using her hands, but is putting her foot on the next step and pushing herself up that way. With her whole leg. You know, the way people who have been climbing stairs long enough to really know what they're doing do. Like, people who aren't only thrice the height of one step. It's an awe-inspiring and nerve-wracking sight for a parent.

Standing is now an all the time thing. Standing in bed? Check. Standing at the picture window waving goodbye to daddy in the mornings? Check. Standing freely in the middle of the room and laughing at the sheer miracle that is one years' progress? Check. She still crawls between places where she stands, but that won't last much longer because...

This week, she took two steps. Not concurrently, but still. Her consecutive total may be one, but her cumulative total number of steps taken without assistance comes to two. So we've got that going for us.

Kathy informs me that's probably enough for now. I guess. But first, one more picture. Ready?

Juliette, on her birthday. And she totally knows it.

I've Become One of Them...

Yeah, all my non-parent readers; you know what I'm talking about. I remember people like me. Or rather, I remember when I was like you and I would meet people like the person I am now.

Two years ago, this would be indicative of the small talk that I would partake in during my daily life:

Me: Nice day, huh?

Person with whom interaction is unavoidable: Yeah, you bet. Nice to finally get a stop to the rain.

Me: Yeah, hope it holds off this weekend, I haven't cut the grass since June 6th.

Person: Yeah, but it's only the ninth.

Me: I meant of 2006.

Person: Ha. I know what you mean. That'll be eighteen dollars. Cash or check?

Me: Check. Who do I make it out to?

Person: The name of the store is fine.

Me: Okay. "Awesome Store For People With No Kids Who Can Still Have Fun R Us." Thanks! Take care!

Person: Have a good one!

Sometimes, I'd get involved with these kinds of conversations:

Me: Little bit wet out today.

Person: I know. Just this morning, I was getting my kids ready to go out for the day, and one of them asked me if rain was the Angels spilling their sippy cups. Oh, I just laughed and laughed!

Me: Ha. Kids sure can be cute.

Person: I know! Here, I'm not even going to ask, I'm just going to show you six hundred identical pictures of my kids!

Me: Ah, cute. Cute...cute...cute...also cute...and cute...and cute...and...cute...so who do I...cute...make the...cute...check...cute...out to...cute...?

Person: This one just learned how to tie his brother's shoes together so that his brother would fall down when he tried to walk! So funny!

But lately, I find my conversations going more like this:

Person: What a gorgeous day? Do you think it'll stay nice, or do you think it'll get really hot again?

Me: LOOK AT THIS PICTURE OF MY BABY!!!!!!!!!! AND ALSO THIS PICTURE OF MY BABY!!!!!!!! AND ALL THESE OTHER PICTURES TOO!!!!!!! LISTEN TO MY STORY ABOUT HER SAYING THE WORD "PICTURE" OVER AND OVER AGAIN!!!!!!

I was reflecting on that today when somebody with whom I was having one of these conversations made the following remark: "Well, somebody sure is a proud father..."

Only, it didn't sound nice. It sounded snarky, like she would rather not have been subjected to the one single picture I showed her of my baby, and that she didn't care to hear that this morning Juliette bit half a Cheerio in half and then offered me the uneaten half for breakfast, since I was running late and had to skip mine. Come on, lady, this might be your future president; don't you take comfort in the fact that she already knows how to share what she has with those less fortunate? Geez.

So, readers, I have become one of them. And I guess you already knew that since I have a blog about it which you are reading at this moment. But just know that if I ever become overbearing with my gushingly effusive love for my daughter, it's only because having a child flips some switch in your brain that turns you into a kind of raving lunatic. You may know what I mean some day.

To all of my readers, have you encountered this? Those of you with children, have you experienced someone else's complete indifference to your child-driven insanity? Those of you without children, has anyone ever driven you to insanity in this way? Let me know.

And now, I leave you with a picture of Juliette, and a promise for a new post tomorrow concerning pictures. Trust me, you'll want to stay tuned for that one!

Juliette 6/25/2011, St. Louis Bread Co, Yogurt Mustache.

What Happened to May?

May went by in a blaze of being too busy, growing too much, and having too much fun.

Also, I've been neglecting all of my blogging duties something terrible for about two months or so, and it stops NOW.

I'd give you all a run down of what has happened in the last two months if I could remember everything, but I can't so I won't. But some highlights:

Jules had her 9 month check-up and it went great. She weighed 17 pounds, 10 ounces, which put her in the 30th percentile for weight. Not exactly awesome, but we have to remember that she has my genes, and I weighed 127 pounds when I graduated from high school ten years ago but stood at six foot three. And speaking of height, she came in at 27 1/2 inches, average height for a girl her age. Though, shortly after the check-up, I can assure you she gained a pound or two and then grew a couple inches.

Mother's Day came and went, with Jules treating Kathy to a little bit of sleeping in, followed by dinner at Granny and Poppy's that evening. That little girl sure loves her momma.

June started, and with it came a little bit of a jump in the mobility of our little girl. She doesn't crawl in the traditional sense: she more army crawls, which seems to be more efficient. Anyway, she's not so much into crawling as she's into pulling herself up and standing, something which for about a week made going to bed incredibly difficult. Turns out, since she found out she could do it, and realized it was easy to do in the crib, she wanted to do it all the time, but didn't know how to get back down without falling at first, so, that was a week of going in and helping her back down, soothing her, etc. She's over it now.

We went to the Botanical Gardens and took family pictures of ourselves and of our friends Beth and Joel and their 6 month old Garrett. We also met with Stephanie and Anthony, new friends who have a beautiful little girl named Allie. Jules had fun playing with both of them and, while I am unsure about that Garrett character and want to know just what his intention are with my daughter, I know we'll be seeing more of them soon.

Father's Day came, and Jules got me a great gift: a pair of $25 Groupons to The Book House, with the stipulation that I spend some of that on books I can read to her. And while I maintain that in fact I can read Jennifer Eagan's A Visit From the Goon Squad to her, certain themes and motifs and words within the book itself have raised the question should I read it to her, so I'll be going back soon to pick up some good children's books.

I promise, more frequent posts in the future. I wish I had a slew of pictures to share with you. And it must be my lucky day, because I actually do have such a slew!

Jules getting ready for a road trip

Easter Sunday in NE

9 Months old and that hair just sticks straight up

She Pinned Me. Again.

Jules and her friend Naomi at the Zoo

The Penguins Were, Apparently, Awesome

Mother's Day Morning, after Momma got up.

This is the wrapping paper Jules "designed" for Granny's present.

Pre-pulling herself up.

Crawling...ish.

Jules' first donut.

Cuteness Factor 10.8

Jules loves curry chicken w/Chickpeas, lentils and rice

Walking through Forest Park

Auntie Angela at Bark in the Park

Chillin' with her feet up on a stroll

Not content just looking at art, Juliette poses for a picture which is now considered a postmodern statement on the modernist interpretation of classical art.

One of the best parts of spring is eating outside!

Auntie Heather's hat looks good, eh?

Spending time with Granny and Ma (Great Grandma McGrath).

She figured out the sippy cup. Next up, blogger, then world domination.

Also, standing has been figured out.

This hat is even bigger than the last one!

Jules and Daddy sliding at the Childrens' Garden at the Botanical Gardens

Ten month pictures at Mo Bot

More Mo Bot

And More Mo Bot

Family Pictures at Mo Bot!

Blazing through nap time.

This is our photo essay about how babies flirt, starring Juliette and Garrett.

She first notices him playing on the ground.

He approaches her, and she remains aloof.

Their hands touch.

He caresses her hair (NOTE: at this point, I was about to show him my non-existent shotgun collection).

He steals her hair bow.

He tries to explain to her how it works, to show he's smart.

They hold hands, and smile.

Just like Daddy, she likes to sit up in bed.

They were playing Hide and Seek.

Juliette won.

STOP GROWING UP!!

Ah, there. That's better. How sweet is this, by the way?